When you are going through a tough time, what is appreciated is empathy.
The worst thing anyone can do is probe you to unpack your mess and after that give you their opinion.
You know what that does, it makes that person feel like their trauma/ordeal has now been diminished. That creates more anger and bitterness than peace and harmony.
So let me ask you, when your friend is going through a tough time, allow them to vent and speak their truth without judgement. Ask yourself the question 'How would I want my friend to respond to me if I was in her shoes?' and then you do accordingly.
We are often so hell bent on sharing what we think would remedy a situation that we pay no mind to the scars of the aftermath certain experiences have left behind.
Abused victims do not want to hear your thoughts and opinions, what they do want and will appreciate, is love, care, understanding and support.
They need assurance that they are not losing their minds and that they are doing the best they can to break free from the bondage they lived in.
So how do you support
Pray for them and direct them to God
Make them laugh
Take them for a coffee to get them out of their environment.
Check on them without conditions
Hold your tongue and just listen
Just some food for thought…
All my love💕
Zen
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