Expressions of Myself

All my life I have been searching and wandering and looking for people to believe in me and somehow I did attract those people, from my immediately(mom, sister, brother, friends) and 8years ago my husband, I was always wanting them to believe in me and support whatever I was busy with at the time, whatever I was passionate about and it made a big difference for a while, it even kept me going. But to some extent their belief in me was just not enough you know, I still felt a bit empty, that's when I started taking a deep look inside of myself, I started to get to know who I really am and I start loving me, you see most of the time we are so busy looking after others well being and making sure everyone is OK that we forget about number 1 ourselves. Its when I really started pursuing my relationship with God that my life turn around and God helped me to love myself, He helped me to believe in myself and my capabilities and its been an awesome journey. I grew from a shy girl never want

Ever been someone’s no.1 fan and you literally do everything and anything to get that person’s attention, you find out what they like, what they dislike and you go out of your way to please them, you actually become a "freak", or better yet you start your own fan club of this person, sounds dumb right? But we do that, you walk their walk and you even talk their talk, you have been there have you not? I have, yeah!! Not to mention the infatuation stage, when you call them or sms them daily or bbm or whatever means you use to get to be connected to them on a daily basis, at first they are all for you loving all the attention and all about you wanting to know you and then one day , yes that one day, you know the day I am talking about , there is just utter SILENCE, no word from them to you even though you were the one who still does the sms’s, bbm messages, suddenly the oh so mutual “me being your no.1 fan” and you returning the favor, turns into an irritation, been there, you