Skip to main content

What you allow will continue

Question: What have you allowed in your life to bring you down to a level that you actually feel less of yourself? What have you allowed to dictate your behavior in such a way that you feel as if you just exist?

I have allowed the opinions of others to matter most in my life and in turn it has actually silenced my own voice, I worked so hard at pleasing others because I didn't want any drama and in the end I was the one who got hurt, I would spend days crying and wrestling with myself knowing I was not happy but I put others happiness first, I wasn't worried about me. Unbeknownst to me I set a standard that I followed to my detriment, I became sick, my chest packed up and it was as if God said “STOP!”

At that point I had to decide to put myself first, it was difficult. It became a daily choice of mine to do things for myself for example taking that long bath and just cutting everything and everyone off, I even started switching my phone off just for 1 hour at a time, so that I CAN TEND TO MYSELF. Not because I didn't want to hear from anyone or be there for others but because I had to tend to myself, see to my own needs, lavish myself with the love I bestowed on others, it was hard however as they say “practice makes perfect”. I am no where near being a master in tending to myself I am however well on my way…

I have learned that I am the director of my own life’s movie and I can teach others how to treat me, I can teach others what I will allow and what I won’t allow. I have found my own voice and it wasn't easy, as passionate as I am at being someone else’s voice in standing up for them I had to stand up for myself, I had to make my own voice heard not in a rude manner but in a very graceful way by demonstrating what isn't OK and what is OK for me, not because I want to keep me better than others but because I know someone who knows my worth and because of Him and His gentle ways I have learnt not to allow people to treat me anyway I don’t like, what we (you and I) allow good or bad will continue…


What changes do you need to make to make sure what you allow is good for you?

  1. Decide what you will allow for your benefit
  2. Decide what you will NOT allow for your benefit
  3. Re-enforce it daily

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

It's OKAY not be OKAY...

TODAY is one of those days I don't allow myself to have many of... A day where I am extremely emotional and teary and life seems to have gotten the better of me just for today. I don't tend to dwell on my negatives I am known to be the optimistic one and always positive however today I am far from that. I allow myself to be in this space because in this moments of being emotional and allowing myself to cry because they say tears are healing waters. I am very much aware of my surroundings and giving myself this space to just process every disappointment and whatever else I am dealing with. A close friend and mentor of mine told me a few months ago that I should learn to unpack things as they happen and not bottle it all up and then I explode when things just get too much. As a mother, wife and whatever else I am to whoever it all just got too much. Have you ever gotten to a point where you question "Why?"   "Why do I even bother talking non stop with my k...

No one is always busy...

Such truth in this picture. I saw this picture message on a page I follow on Facebook and it made me think and reflect and I shared it on my page but I didn't elaborate at the time because I was still filled with negative emotions. Then this morning a friend of mine shared it on her page and these are my thoughts about this and I am referring to friendships/relationships with family and just relationships in general. So please allow me to express myself.. What is most difficult to comprehend is that we allow people to have so much space in our lives and they give so little of their time to us...It hurts immensely when you know how committed you are to certain friendships/relationships and you get absolutely the bare minimum and that fact is what is making me walk away from many. Zainonesha had this to say about it " So true...then one has to settle with lame excuses as if our lives are depending on it. Be Honest I would say" Yes I understand that we are all in dif...

Being a MOM

While I pride myself in being a Mom, a nurturer and everything that goes with it, I have been feeling much like a failure of late. My girls (especially the middle one and the eldest one) have been struggling in their schoolwork not the understanding of the work but the self discipline that goes with making progress at school. A week ago I sat on one of the benches at the station and just managing to at that time (7am ) of the morning to write notes to teachers in message books as I had kept the girls at home the previous Friday because I forgot to do it the night before. As I went from one message book t o the next I opened the last one that was my middle daughter’s and here two warnings and a nice message from her teacher stared at me. As I proceeded to read the note I was filled with anger and much disappointment... I completely became one of those ladies that just let it “rip” on the train station and yes the “nasty” mom came out you know the one where you switch to Afrik...